Tuesday, June 11, 2013

The weight has lifted

I felt stuck for awhile. I got into a position that I felt pigeon holed in and didn't think I could get out of and it was making me miserable more and more each day. and if I'm honest, a bit resentful.

It struck me while on the plane about to fly back home from my Uncle's funeral just how unhappy I was and wanted a change. In fact I wanted to do something downright rash. My brain was going a mile a minute as I concocted idea after idea but forced myself to sit on it and pray. Keep it from others because I felt they would think me irrational.

I patiently impatiently waited and prayed and as my little mental time frame neared with each day passing, I got more and more confident in my decision. Even if at that moment, I didn't have a backup plan. So on May 31st, I met with my 2 supervisors and discussed my position. I sat in the conference room, my body tense, my face blank as we talked about the raise I wanted. That they were unwilling to give.

And that they ultimately rejected.

I calmly informed them if they didn't meet the amount I wanted, to consider that very moment my 2 week notice and they were quite taken aback. One even turned to the other asking to step out so they could discuss it, but the other refused and condescendingly repeated what I said so he could be clear with what I was threatening.

I confirmed it, not budging under his belittling tone and he asked if I'd wait until the following Monday to see if they'd meet my demand, and I agreed but not before reiterating that if they didn't agree, my 2 weeks began Friday.

The meeting ended and I returned to my desk as if nothing happened but with my mind in a whirl over everything that was said. Growing slowly angry as I thought over what he said and how he said it. It felt good knowing I had my 2 weeks looming overhead, even if it wasn't official yet.

I opened my email and there all by itself sat an email for a position I applied for over a month ago, just waiting for me to open, inviting me to start their testing process. A position that I've prayed for the moment I saw it, that I had countless others pray for for me and I knew in that moment God was taking care of things.

I called my supervisor back down to my desk and told him not to bother until Monday, that I was done and officially quit. He was surprised by what he saw was an out of the blue action, but knowing it was official, I couldn't hide my relief.

My last day is on the 14th, and even though I might not get the other job, I know I'll be alright. It dawned on me that I don't need to stay in a job that under-appreciates me and who thinks I should be grateful for the incredibly low wage they were paying with being told "a lot of people out there don't get paid what they feel they should".

There's better out there. It could be the job I'm testing for that pays 2 1/2 times more or another that pays a little less. Regardless, I know that I don't have to settle and feel stuck anymore, and that is the most freeing thing ever.

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Katie said...

How exciting! I bet you feel a million tons lighter.

Amanda Wissmann said...

I'm so proud of you :) On to happier days! Praying that you get the right job at the right time!

The Heart Of A Woman said...

I'm praying its the job you applied for!

Erin Pasillas said...

Way to go Em!! And yay for God's timing!!! All this scheming, though, is quite intriguing... and all I have these days is TIME to think and wonder what you're up to:)

Evelien said...

So exciting!
You brave woman haha :)
I really hope you get the job, just because you were so brave ;)


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