Tuesday, January 31, 2012

No foreigner of words

The past 5 days have been nothing but insane. Not to mention exhausting.

I never thought I’d ever say the words, ‘my Dad had a massive heart attack’ but I’ve said it several times in the last 5 days and know I’ll continue to say it, because he did. Friday.

I was in the middle of vacuuming when I saw my phone light up with a call from my mom’s cell and I knew it wasn’t good since she was supposed to be at work.

Things were definitely crazy. Calling my brothers, arranging all of us to drive or fly to be together. My sister was already at the hospital, waiting to hear more as he was getting worked on. By Saturday morning we were all in his CCU room together. It was weird, seeing him on the bed hooked up to monitors, but he was in good spirits.

My brothers were on the mark, cracking jokes one after another, having us be the only room in the entire CCU, making a lot of noise, laughing.
first time in 4 years we’ve all been together. {for the record, my sister has a scarf under her coat..}
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He was given the clear to go to a normal floor and unfortunately had to share a room with a mental druggie who ‘mysteriously broke his ankle in 3 places.’ (he claims he ‘fell out of bed’…)

{I did overhear him say on the phone that “they broke it real good”…who knows what that means}

The weekend was long and exhausting. For my mom and me, and especially my dad. We stayed with him just about every hour of the day, talking and keeping him company. Coming back worn out and smelling of hospital.

Finally, Monday morning he was given the clear to go home. But not before his druggie roommate caused a commotion by refusing the nurse’s orders and hitting her in the arm. I can’t even tell you how done  we were at that point.

He’s going to have to make lifestyle changes. I don’t imagine it’ll be easy for him, but I hope he knows how important it is to stick around just a little bit longer. For selfish reasons, of course.

Thank you to everyone for all your thoughts and prayers for him and my family over these past 5 days. They’ve been more than appreciated and felt. They said if he’d waited 15 minutes more before coming in to the ER, he would have died. A crazy thought.

Those words, I’m thankful for, will continue to be foreign for me.

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Monday, January 30, 2012

My indestructible Dad

My Dad is strong.
He does not get sick.
He does not get hurt.
Nothing bad ever happens to him.
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He doesn’t age. He doesn’t have gray hair and he never has ailments. He doesn’t get pain in his chest, numbness and loss of feeling in his arm and he never has constant headaches.

He’s as strong as an ox. He doesn’t need doctors to stick him or poke him or examine him.
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He’s healthy.

He’s always going to be around. He’s never going to not be there because he’s my Dad, and he’d never die.

And he knows that.
I’ll never not have my Dad around to hear his jokes.
I’ll never not have him around to watch movies with.
I’ll never not have him around for all those little moments in my life.

I may get older but my Dad won’t.
He’s indestructible.
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I love you, Dad.

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Friday, January 27, 2012

Its freeing to do..this confessing thing

Happy Friday!!

Who else is suuuper excited for their weekend? Raise of hands, please…

I felt like confessing some things, so lets get right down to bid-nis

I confess…
I fear on a daily basis that I’ll type G-man’s real name and not catch it.

Thankfully I have yet to do this.

I confess…

I have caught myself on several occasions from calling G-man..’G-man’ to his face.

I’ll get as far as ‘Geeee’… and then switch to his actual name. To the best of my knowledge, I don’t believe he’s aware of this nickname…
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I confess…
The name he goes by is actually his middle name. ..and naturally, it starts with a G.
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I confess…
I only use his first name when I mean business…which is rare, to be totally honest.

And the few times I do use it, it sounds foreign, like I called him by the wrong name. Especially since my brother in law has the same first name and actually goes by it. So it feels all sorts of wrong for me. However with that said, I love his first name.

I confess…
I think God has a sense of humor. I always prayed for ‘my man’ to be taller than me, {being 5’11” and all}.

…G-man is exactly 1 inch taller.

I confess…
I hardly ever wear eye makeup beyond mascara and one day I decided to wear eye shadow and all day long G-man couldn’t stop saying how beautiful my eyes were.
{which was great…not gonna lie}
but he couldn’t pinpoint why they were more beautiful {his words} that day.

I never told him it was the eye shadow…

I confess…
I think about wearing eye shadow more..

I confess…
when I was on a skype date with 2 lovely ladies, G-man called and I muted my microphone to take the call…or so I thought.

I ended up muting my speakers instead and they got to be privy to the entire conversation, unbeknownst to me. Thankfully nothing incriminating was said.

aahhhhhh, I feel so much better.
I hope everyone has a fantastic weekend. I get to do something extra special that I can’t wait for and can’t wait to tell you all about it next week!! Yippy!!

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Thursday, January 26, 2012

Color obsessed

Thank you so much for your sweet comments on yesterday’s post. Its been something that I’ve been thinking a lot about lately and felt like I had to say. We definitely aren’t alone and its nice to see everyone being encouraging..just what we need more of. = )

This week has actually been a really tough week for me. The beginning was, actually. Looking over myself and seeing all that’s going on…or not going on in my life was putting me in a major funk. Top that off with not being able to have any communication with G-man for days and days was wearing me down! Satan sure knows how to work in those moments.

Stephanie told me she once had to go 11 weeks without hearing from her husband when he was on deployment years ago and I’m not sure I could make it, if that was my case. Just going these 6 days have been really hard.

I should hear from him Saturday, since he’ll be back in the states though, and I can’t wait!
*updated. I heard from him last night!! A complete surprise and I almost didn’t answer the ‘blocked’ number, but so glad I did.

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For Christmas, G-man got me a giftcard to one of my..no, my favorite clothing store and days after getting it, I got online and picked out 9 tops. If it wasn’t for taxes I wouldn’t have had to pay a penny, but as it was, I only paid $7. I couldn’t wait to get them and was seriously jumping for joy at getting all but 1 top on sale.

And then, not 2 days after placing the order, I get the store’s email promoting a $20.12 off all orders over X amount…my X amount…I could have saved $20!! Isn’t that how it always is!?

Alas, I got them all and only liked 5 of them, so off to the store I went to return them and pick out fun new clothes.

I learned 2 {not so new} things about myself that day.
1. I have an unhealthy obsession with gray. and..
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keep in mind there are 3 more gray shirts that were still in the dryer when I took this picture…
2. I have an unhealthy obsession with purple. ..oh, and
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3. I’m scared of pattern. (I didn’t buy this)
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Ok so that’s 3 things…
My mom is probably nodding her head agreeing. I can’t even count how many years of effort she’s put into getting me out of solids.

I’m like a leap year. Every 4 years, I finally muster up the courage to buy a stripe over solid…then a design on a small part of the shirt…then a plaid. At this rate, I’ll be 70 before I feel comfortable wearing a full patterned top. I’ll be that crazy old lady with the eccentric clothing.

Would you still talk to me?

What color are you obsessed with?

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Wednesday, January 25, 2012

I’m not like you

No matter how hard I try to fit in. Squeeze into your little click or force laugh at a fairly inappropriate comment or start acting like you to see if you’ll notice me, I just will never be like you. And finally? After all these years, I’ve learned it doesn’t matter.

I don’t pretend to understand how a good friend of mine can be friends with me and a person that, no matter how I slice it, just can’t like. It makes me question me..and then my friend. But mostly  me. Why can’t I like this person? Am I not open enough, kind, willing to accept, able to love them regardless of their flaws?

Have I just become so hard in my personality that I don’t even give a person a fighting chance?

Its safe to say everyone who blogs realizes there’s clicks. Girls who stick together, who (some) tease or pick on other bloggers who aren’t in the click. Just like school or work. I don’t think we ever escape the ‘cool kids’ in any part of our lives. I think some bloggers think because we’re adults, we’re “above” all the scheming, lying and trash talking, but you can all think of that one girl at work who is the office gossip. Or who likes to spread rumors, for pleasure, to get ahead or because they feel its their duty. They’ll always be there.

I admit, when I saw what some would call the ‘cool girls’ in blog land, I attempted to befriend them. Some it worked and I learned they’re genuine and in no way put themselves in the category. Others, wouldn’t even give me the time of day {for whatever reason} and as I silently, invisibly {to them} watched them through twitter and their blog, I saw who they really were and was happy they didn’t ‘accept’ me.

I’m me. Not everyone will like me. Heck, I don’t like me some days, but not everyone has to accept me either and I am content with that. I’m learning I don’t need the ‘cool girl’s’ approval in life. I’m happy where I am, who I am, and with the friends I already have and hope to make. Because all my friends are genuine. They aren’t fake, starving for attention, pretending to be something they aren’t. Lying to get noticed or being controversial and making waves for fun.

They are real and loving and they like me because I stay true to myself and don’t compromise. I’m not a ‘make friends to say I have friends’ person, I’m a builder of relationships that last. I fail sometimes but those few I have, I know I’ll have for life.

I think the moment we stop being who we think people want us to be is the moment we’ll truly be happy with ourselves and how God intended us to be. Conforming to a group to fit in, is definitely the last thing, I think He wanted for us.
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Tuesday, January 24, 2012

A game of tag, anyone?

I’ve been tagged by, not 1 but 2 beautiful bloggers in this fun little ‘game’ so I thought I better play, cause this girl doesn’t turn down a game!

Let’s discuss the rules before I begin to overshare.

1. you must post the rules.
2. post 11 fun facts about yourself on the blog post.
3. answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post, and then create 11 new questions to ask the people you've tagged.
4. tag 11 people and link them on your post
5. let them know you've tagged them!

Now, let’s begin
1. I can say ‘larger is better’ in 3 languages. Italian, Hawaiian and English. A car commercial years ago taught me this little phrase. A car commercial. and no, I haven’t ever used it.

2. I won’t text or call any of my married friends after 5pm unless they contact me. I feel its interrupting their family time.

3. I didn’t know I could take an iPhone picture with my volume button until the iPhone commercial showed it. My life was changed.

4. I just canceled my Directv since there’s nothing good on anymore and tv bores me.

5. I’ve been to Hawaii 10 times in the past 1 1/2 years.

6. I don’t work {for good reasons} which lets me run away often. And in case you’re wondering more, this is what I was waiting for and this is what I used to do.

7. I’ve been driving since I was 14 1/2 years old.

8. I’ve been pulled over more than 15 times and have received..somewhere near 12-14 tickets BUT only 2 have been on my record…though only 1 should have been.

9. One cop that pulled me over, immediately bought my coffee after letting me go. {what can I say….}

10. One time I was driving down the street and spotted a dollar laying in the road. I flipped a U (hoping no one would see it) and it ended up being $100 bill!

11. I watched Tangled last night..alone..and laughed..out loud. {no shame}

So, since Tabitha with My Cliffnotes and Ashley with Episodes of a Mixed Girl both tagged me and both asked 11 questions each, I chose the 11 best {for me} to answer. Yes, I took liberty on this.

1. What is your favorite book and what are you currently reading?
hmmm, I’m going to claim a series. The Mark of the Lion series by Francine Rivers. By far some of the best books I’ve ever read.
I just finished The Help a week ago and haven’t picked up anything else yet.
2. What is your favorite room in your house, why?
my living room. Its very cozy. My butt print on my couch is proof of that.
3. What is your go to store, and why?
Target. There’s no need to explain that…its Target.
4. Favorite color to wear and why?
green. Everything green. It makes my eyes pop.
5. Favorite thing to watch on the tube?
I’m actually really getting into the show Once Upon a Time. oh and Up All Night is hilarious, and even though this season is sucking, I love How I Met Your Mother.
6. How would you style a basic white-t?
with denim jeans, black belt, and a contrasting necklace. If I had a hot leather biker jacket, I’d wear that.
7. Favorite breakfast food, and why?
breakfast burrito with bacon, eggs, lots of cheese and light pappas. Cause its just so darn yummy!
8. What is your favorite movie?
Frequency. Loved it so much I watched it with the directors’ commentary. (which was very interesting)
9. What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?
that my alarm, across my room won’t stop beeping.
10. What was the last thing you ate?
a ‘fried’ chicken dinner with rice and a diced tomato sauce. Very very tasty.
11. If you had to choose between Facebook and Blogger? Which one?
As many of you know, I dumped Facebook just 2 weeks ago and clearly agreed to be monogamous with Blogger. We’re very happy together.

You still with me?! Ok, now I’m chasing you down to tag.

Jossie at Schauerhamers (say that 5 times fast)
Erin at Erin Clicks
Natalie at Scribbles n Things
Sam at Fitness Food and Faith
Megan at Mackey Madness
LeAnna at Thoughts n Whatnots
Tatiana at Living Life and Loving It
Carissa at Lowercase Letters
Becky at This Road Called Vida
Allison at The Blogivers
Jennifer at Jennifer Blair Photography

brace yourselves for my intelligent questions.
1.How old were you when you had your 1st kiss?
2.Do you remember your first kiss’s name? If so, what is it?
3.Where’s the furthest you’ve traveled?
4.Where’s your favorite place to getaway?
5.What’s your favorite ice cream flavor?
6.Do you prefer a wood fireplace or gas fireplace? and why?
7.What was your very first car?
8.If you were forced to choose between a chapstick, toothbrush or hairbrush to go with you on a deserted island, which one would you pick?
9.What past time period would you like to live in? and why?
10.Which food could you not live without?
11.Which food do you believe is of the devil? {figuratively speaking of course}

and now for a completely random unrelated picture..
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Monday, January 23, 2012

A thankful me - 4

How is this the last week of January already?! I think I’ve lost all ability to keep up with the flying time.

{sign you’re getting old…you comment frequently on time passing}

I hope everyone had a fun weekend. Mine consisted of cleaning out closets and cabinets. Not to mention my pantry and then organizing it. Seriously! I can’t stop starring at how pretty my pantry looks.
See? See? See? I’ll randomly open the door just to stand there and admire it.
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This week has been a good week, quiet but good. I’ve hardly heard from G-man and know I won’t hear from him until he gets home next weekend. Friday morning was last I heard from him in email telling me he wouldn’t be able to talk until he got home.

I still email him daily, even though I don’t even know if he’s getting them. It helps me though.

This week I’m thankful for-

- the few times he was able to email me. They were short quick little notes, but I’ll take those over none any day.
- all the leftovers I finished from when he was here. I realize that was 2 weeks ago, but they lasted…for the most part. It kept me from having to cook.
- my parents letting me connect to their Netflix and Hulu Plus accounts on my PS3 since I canceled my Directv. It has gotten me through my nights!
- Sweet LeAnna getting me properly hooked on Downton Abbey. I only watched the entire 1st Season in 1 night. That’s 7 hours straight. Didn’t make it to bed until 1am. And now catching up on Season 2 online.
- having my friend come over to watch The Help with me. We hadn’t hung out in a long time and it was great catching up. ..the movie on the other hand. Wasn’t into it like everyone else.
- taking my friend’s family photos.
a sneak peak
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- making it a rule to keep my laptop on my {hardly used} dining table. I’ve banned it from my living room. Its made a huge difference with my productivity.
- my Esthetician sister in law who’s been beyond helpful with all my skin and product questions.

So, tell me. What makes you thankful today?

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Friday, January 20, 2012

5 pickles in a field

a play on my sister’s last name that only my family will {potentially} find humorous…

I am no longer the worst sister in the world. I have officially finished editing my sister’s family pictures I did on Christmas Eve and mailed the cd to her just 2 days ago. A 3 1/2 week turn around ain’t too shabby.

I jest. {have no fear Michelle, I won’t take that long on yours.}

The day couldn’t have been better. G-man and I had driven in from San Francisco with an hour or so to spare before meeting up with my sister and adorably as we were getting in the car to head over, G-man tells me to pop the hatch without looking.

He slides something in, closes it and jumps in the passenger seat. As I’m going down the road he tells me I should pull over to open up a small little box all wrapped up, saying it was a ‘personal gift’ he wanted to give me just the 2 of us.

I open it, eager, and it’s a remote control for my camera. {clearly he was joking about the personal part} but he thought I might want to use it for the photo shoot. I thought that was so sweet. When we got to my sister’s house, he opened the back and there sat a tripod for my camera. Love that man!

Unfortunately, I didn’t use either that day but love them all the same and have used them since!

We met up on someone’s property with pretty trees and a beautiful line to the sun setting.
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My nephew cracked a joke which had them laughing up a storm. It was about diapers, in case you’re wondering.
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We could discuss why I kept them in the dirt and not on the pretty field behind them, but let’s just pretend I wanted to be “different” and “artistic” with it, and not a complete rookie with a lot to learn. They’re still adorable in my book.
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This has to be one of my favorites from this session. I love my niece’s face and my brother in law looking at me with a peak of my sister’s smile.
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..and of course this one is among them as well.
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A shoot can’t go without kissing, in my book.
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Hello, my beautiful sister.
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I absolutely love my niece with her, ‘just one minute, please’ finger. I respectfully waited until she was done with her call before we resumed.
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She still didn’t want to part with the phone though…
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A big hearty thank you to my sister and family for being so willing to let me practice on them. It was thoroughly enjoyable and I sure learned a heck of a lot.

I hope you lovely ladies have a wonderful weekend. Drink some coffee for me..sans creamer of course. *wink wink*

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Thursday, January 19, 2012

How I kicked the nasty habit

I used to have an addiction. I’m not proud of this. A little ashamed, in fact. I think about the damage its done to my body over the years I ingested it, and cringe knowing I might never recover...
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My addiction…coffee creamer.

Say it ain’t so!!? ..oh its so.

It started out normal. I grew up with milk, then 1/2 and 1/2 but as I became an adult, the choices were overwhelming. Vanilla, Hazelnut, Irish Crème, Cinnamon Vanilla…then all the holiday creamers…oh the possibilities were endless!!

But there was one. One that grabbed me and swore it would never let go. Cinnamon Vanilla. We were instantly in love. I spat out everything else. I took it everywhere with me to ensure the best coffee experience. People warned me of the risks, but I didn’t care. I was in love and no one could tell me otherwise.

Then one day, all the stores stopped selling it. It was like they were intervening. Meddling where they didn’t belong. I searched high and low, going into groceries stores I never would normally go, in hopes they would carry it. Not one did. I felt broken.

Until, on a whim, more than 120 miles away, I pulled into the parking lot of a store. My hopes were low as I walked toward the dairy section, and what did my eyes behold? My creamer. My beloved creamer in 2 whole rows! I grabbed 3, embraced them tight and ran to the cashier with a smile as big as can be.

Once my supply ran low, I returned to that same store 120 miles away and saw they didn’t have as many and feared they were beginning to meddle as well. I grabbed the last 2 and made my way home, looking in the backseat with adoring eyes at my 2 beloved creamers tucked tight.

It struck me not much longer after that, my possible addiction. I didn’t want to face it fully but knew I needed to acknowledge something was there. G-man was there to encourage me. Filling me with facts of my beloved creamers poisons all while rubbing my back, soothing me.

I started slow. Only using 1/2 the amount with heavy whipping cream. Then less, then less…until I was completely out and only had heavy whipping cream in its place. It took months to adjust but loved the flavor of coffee again, on its own. Then reality struck….heavy whipping cream wasn’t a great choice either.

With a heavy heart, I began the transition to 1/2 and 1/2. A slow slow process that again took months of fine tuning the right amount of sugar with it, to make me love it once again.

Now I’m hooked. 1/2 and 1/2 and I are best friends. We share our mornings together and laugh over the difficult days filled with withdrawals, but I’ll never regret my choice, my decision, to kick that nasty habit…nay…addiction that was flavored coffee creamer.

*if you face similar addictions, know you aren’t alone and that you have a support group standing by to help you through your difficult times ahead. Don’t let flavored coffee creamer rule you one more day.

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Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Liebster Award

The ever adorable and sweet Claire with Fast Forward Girl awarded me with the Liebster Award. It goes to anyone who has under 200 followers and who they feel deserves a little more recognition. Color me happy, she picked me!

The rules of said award are as follows:
1. Show your thanks by linking to the award giver.
2. Leave links to 5 of your top blogs and leave a sweet comment letting them know.
3. Post the award on your blog.
4. Enjoy and bask in the love.

So let me pick my five who I feel needs to get noticed a wee bit more.

Tabitha with My Cliffnotes: She has become my fast friend and fantastic accountability partner with working out. She’s hilarious and kind and is a great cheerleader when I need and getting on me when I’m slacking. I’ve really enjoyed getting to know her more.

Amy with Dwell in the Season: She is just the sweetest thing ever. Her and her husband are expecting their first baby, and it’s a boy! And it is such a treat being able to follow along with her as her belly grows more and more. She has fantastic sewing tutorials on just about everything and even though I don’t know the first thing about it, she makes me want to consider learning.

Katie with J & K: Katie is so fun to know. She’s an animal with finishing up her Masters and now starting her dream internship all while getting settled in their very first house they bought. She’s doing the 30 days picture challenge and has been showing some great pictures. Oh and she loves rap. I think I’ll always chuckle at that fact as she doesn’t fit the ‘type’. ;-)

Christina with He Makes All Things New: I personally know Christina. We used to live in the same town years ago and she happens to be my birthday twin. (I’m the older!!) She is sweet as can be, has a passion for NEEDTOBREATHE and the Lord…I probably should flip those, but she is a great person inside and out. Even though she hasn’t blogged since Christmas Eve, her heart is one to get to know.

Erin with Erin Clicks: This dear girl right here is my in real life friend who just started her blog 2 weeks ago. I can’t say enough wonderful things about her OR her photography as IT.IS.AMAZING. She’s my go to girl for tips, thoughts, ideas and anything under the sun. I love this girl to death! Like. love! Her humor is spot on with mine. And her kids….adorable. She calls one Moose…you must check her out.

Thank you Claire so so much for giving me the love! I feel it. Now ladies, go spread the love yourselves!

Since I must, let me ease your eyes with an orange grove I came across the other week. I still don’t know why there were hundreds of oranges and lemons on the ground. It was eerie.
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If anyone knows, feel free to fill me in.

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Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Artist in motion

Well before Christmas, my friend’s husband asked me if I would shoot an event he was doing that coming weekend at a nearby church. I happily obliged since I had yet to see him perform and had heard some great things about it.

Rick is an artist. But not just an artist who paints, he’s an artist who does martial arts while painting. Its an amazing site to see. But once again, he doesn’t just paint with his hands and feet, he shares the gospel all while doing it.

What’s even more unique about it all is he paints in the dark with black lights. Its pretty cool, I’m tellin’ ya. A challenge for someone who’s taking pictures but even watching it through my camera it was so enjoyable. And hearing his testimony and story was something, too! He’s led quite an interesting life.

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A few minutes before the show.
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It was right before Christmas, so can you see the storyline?
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From the angel, to the star shining down on baby Jesus, to Mary holding Him.
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To His ultimate sacrifice for us.
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Rick’s traveled the world performing for all kinds of groups, kids, crowds and is so much fun to get to know.

He has a couple websites, so I encourage you to check him out here and here.

After his performance, they took me to a Vietnamese restaurant. My first experience.
Pho, that was good…minus whatever it was I had to spit out. And the smoothie with the tapioca balls in it, which surprisingly was pretty tasty.
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Has anyone ever had that? Or remember what its called?

You’ll be seeing more of Rick and my friend because it was their family I just photographed yesterday! I can’t wait to share with you all!

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Monday, January 16, 2012

A thankful me - 3

Well hello everyone! What a glorious Monday this is turning out to be, don’t you think?
{just say it with me} “Its-a-glorious-Monday.”

There, now we’ll all believe it.

I want to give a hearty hi to all my new followers {but I don’t like the term ‘followers’} so I’m going to say “buddies”.  Hi Buddies!! Thanks for jumping on the ‘bus o’ fun’ with me.

This past week was a decent one. The first week since G-man left and I did alright for the most part. It usually takes a few days for it to sink in and return to normal operations and this time was no different. By day 5 I was in my funk. More so because he’s in “Y” country again for a few weeks, and we don’t get to talk hardly ever the whole time.

So radio silence is tough to take, sometimes. {everyone knows that term, right? I’ve been thinking a lot about work lately, so a lot of work phrases have been in my head…}

But let’s not dwell. This very week, I’m thankful for:

- his safe arrival in “Y” Country.
- a wonderful visit with my friend, who happened to bring me “The Help” to read. Finished it in 3 days. A little long and drawn out but otherwise a pretty good book.
- my mom for loaning me the movie. I plan on watching it real soon.
- G-man surprising me with buying Adele’s “Someone Like You” song. He knows I love that song even though its really sad and without telling me, bought it for me.
- my sweet friend who’s always so quick to give me Photoshop advice and constructive criticism over my photos. I appreciate her honesty so so much.
- my awesome sister for being my 100th “buddy”.
- all the link love last week. From Megan to Tabitha to Claire to Ashley. These ladies are the best.
- you. Seriously, you guys don’t even know how much each comment you leave, each joke you tell, brightens my days. Thank you for taking time to ‘talk’ to me each day.

This afternoon, I’ll be doing my friend’s family photos. I’m excited, beyond excited! Pray my confidence stays high. I’ve only done my sister’s family, so the nerves are still an issue for me.

Speaking of, here’s a little sneak of my sister and her fam.
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Sis, I hope you like it, seeing how you haven’t seen this one yet.

Did you have a nice weekend? Anyone as disappointed as I was in the Saints?

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Friday, January 13, 2012

It’s not a resolution

I’m not a resolution setter. Haven’t been for many many years. I see too many resolutions being made only to quickly see them get ignored with the old way of living quickly returning. I saw it plenty in my own self when I used to set little goals or resolutions each year. They’re just taken too lightly, in my opinion.

Beyond the masses making resolutions, I’ve also been seeing a ‘word for the year'. Picking one word that you want to be centered around for the year. Interesting concept. I hadn’t heard of doing this until I joined the blog world.

But for me?? I’m eliminating one word. Weeeeell, reducing. I’d like to look at it as a commitment rather than anything else, because when I, my own self, get tired of hearing a word constantly come out of my mouth, I think, ‘surely, everyone else is tired of it.’
{don’t call me Shirley…}

So, *clears throat* I hereby announce I will be reducing my use of the word:

DUDE!

No joke.

Dude is my go to word when I’m frustrated with someone, when I’m shocked over a statement, pretty much any opportunity I can use it…at the tv, at G-man, at a kid, at the driver in front of me…it gets said.

No more, I say…no more.
oh wait….before I commit..
Dude, seriously, that’s Michael Buble and he totally slapped my hand when he walked by! Aaaaaaaawesome!!

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oh oh and Dude! ya gotta check out this sah-weet picture of bacon I took with my brand new 35mm lens I got from my love for Christmas. It’s epic.
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There. All better.
What one word would you pick to reduce from your vocabulary? I fear, all you momma’s, when you ask me if I’m going to the potty or that you have to go to the potty (when no child is around but adults…) you might want to consider joining me… just sayin’.

Cause I will heckle you. Fair warning.

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Thursday, January 12, 2012

I’m a coper, you’re a coper, we’re all copers

Its been 1 whole week I’ve been Facebook free. How oh how have I done it?!!?

Pretty darn easily, if I do say so myself.

In this week, I’ve been on it twice and that’s only because I helped 2 people on 2 separate occasions in their own Facebook accounts.

I haven’t missed it one single day.

Have I been on the internet less since? – No! I still manage to find other sites to suck my time up, so I’m still working on that, but its nice being ‘free’.

Have I started to build better relationships with my Facebook friends since? – No! I’ve only talked to 3 of the 132 friends I’ve had on there. But in all fairness, we weren’t really talking when I was on Facebook.

However, I have been communicating more with one since leaving. Hi Annie!!! *waving*

A week later I still don’t regret my decision to delete my Facebook account.

::~~~::~~~::~~~::~~~::~~~::

In other coping news, I’m coping with not having G-man around since Sunday. No worries, I’m not Debbie Downer over here. It is what it is.

I miss his company, humor, passion over football and the conversations he’d have with me as if I were his ‘guy friend’ talking stats and football history. My eyes may glaze and my ears may get a ringing sound where I only comprehend every 3rd word, but I sit there, give him full eye contact and with a smile nod my head and say ‘hhmm’ when needed.

It makes me feel special that he wants to share something he’s so passionately into with me. So I’m happy to “listen”.

Over the course of me jabbering about the G-man, I’ve had several people ask me to post a picture of him.

I wish I could. …but I can’t.

I somehow have led people to believe his line of work prevents me to post it, and part of me wants you to keep believing that, because that’s just cool sounding. Not to say it isn’t entirely true. His line of work can put him in danger. He does travel overseas, where I never say the country, because its for his safety.

But when it comes to the picture, its simply because he does not want me to post it.

I’ve asked. Waited a few months and asked again and each time its always no. I’m not going to ever post a picture without his authorization, so until that time, I’ll continue to show his hand, or arm, or back.
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He’s a private man, this one. He doesn’t like being all over the internet. He still doesn’t grasp me blogging and I just about never bring it up to him. He actually doesn’t even read my blog. {shocker?} As he puts it, he doesn’t want to interfere with my creativity by reading it. Meaning…he doesn’t want to read it, not like it and tell me how much he doesn’t like it, so he just doesn’t read it.

For the record, I got him to read my first two posts when I first started, to get his opinion. We were both nervous. Him, because he knew if it sucked, he’d tell me and didn’t want to hurt my feelings and me because I knew if he thought it sucked, he’d tell me…and it would hurt my feelings.

In the end, he thought I actually wrote quite well, but declared he wouldn’t read anymore…the creativity and all.

So in the meantime, we all are going to have to continue to cope with the fact that I can’t share with you my one and only G-man. But one day, my friends. One day I will get that approval and you can bet your fanny I will post my little heart out until he or you scream stop.

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Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Bake me a sandwich

I realize this is uncharacteristic. I’m not a food blogger by any means. I’m pretty certain food bloggers don’t take pictures with their cell phones throughout the whole process.

With that said, I had to share what I made for G-man and me the other night. I haven’t made this in ages and when it popped into our heads, I jumped at making it again. Its so darn yummy.

I broke it down {obviously} for you to make it super easy to follow and make.
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Preheat oven to 415 degrees
Steps 1-4: Spread mayo (yes, mayo) on one side of each slice of preferably sour dough bread. Lay mayo side down on cookie sheet. Add a layer of Swiss cheese then {preferably} Bulls Eye BBQ (but I ran out…as you see)

Steps 5-8: layer with roast beef, then red peppers then more swiss. Top it off with more BBQ sauce and put the bread mayo side up.

Steps 9-12: Bake for 10 minutes, flip over, bake for another 7-9 minutes. Slice in half and serve it up.

Enjoy. Trust me, you will enjoy!

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Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Sometimes and always…



This is epic that I get to participate in Megan’s link up. It took me an awkwardly long time to come up with my sometimes/always. It’s a lot harder than I thought it’d be, so I told her she needed to keep doing this for at least a month (from the time I told her) to make sure I’d have a chance to play along.

It literally took me a month. I’m not as clever as I thought.

Sometimes I turn the corner and barely miss running into the door frame.
I always do a ninja spin move to side swipe it only to slam into it any way.

Sometimes when I have a really bad headache, I take it easy and keep things real quiet around me.
I always manage to slam every cabinet door, chew really crunchy foods and stare into every light bulb around.

Sometimes I’m mindful of others around me in public and keep to myself.
I always end up having conversations with myself and they usually take place when I’m around strangers. I’ve been known to talk to the food that’s in my hand or on the shelf. {should I not share that?}

Sometimes I just want to go for a drive and cruise around not worrying about other drivers or how fast I can get there.
I always end up getting around the slower drivers which makes me become one of the ‘faster’ drivers on the road. I prefer to be in front of cars rather than behind.

That was fun. It’ll probably be my one and only Sometimes/Always post unless my brain can kick into gear and produce some more, but that was fun.

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Monday, January 9, 2012

A thankful me - 2

I’m back to the grind. The grind of my daily every day life. G-man went back to HI yesterday morning and I drove back home from San Francisco fighting a headache that wanted badly to turn into a migraine.

I guess that’s the best way to top off a sad day. But it did improve when I sat down, turned on the tv and caught Tebow throwing the winning touchdown. Oh, and I can’t forget the highlight of my whole Sunday of seeing my parents and my mom giving me an entire jar of her delicious salsa. She’s the best.

This Monday, to keep positive, remain upbeat, and stay enthusiastic, I’m thankful for the following:
- G-man and all the things he does for me, like:
- rubbing my feet every single night
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- washing all the dishes after every breakfast lunch and dinner
- scrubbing down my entire apartment to make it ‘sparkle’ so I could come home after dropping him off at the airport to a clean home
- never sitting down at the table until I sit down
- going to workout with me 3 days last week
- filling up my tank
and all the many many ways he shows his love for me. I truly love that man like no other.

- my new running shoes. They are pretty stinking great. And snazzy too.
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- my town finally putting stop signs in a 4 way intersection. There weren’t any in either direction, so picture all 4 directions able to go through without stopping. Can we say accidents?! I literally clapped and cheered when I drove through and saw the new stop signs.

How’d the weekend treat you? Do anything crazy awesome, like watch football non stop? Oh, that was just me?? I know entirely too much about college football right now. Way too much. I feel its my duty to point out the National Championship game that’s on tonight. LSU vs Alabama baby!! SEC!!!
{someone hold me}

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Friday, January 6, 2012

It’s the little things

I really enjoyed everyone’s response to my post yesterday. I completely understand the reasoning for keeping your Facebook account and completely understand the reasoning for getting rid of it.

I had a headache yesterday and told G-man I had a lack of Facebook headache like you’d get a lack of caffeine headache. – I jest.

Can I just say how sad I’m getting? Not over Facebook, but over knowing G-man is leaving in less than 60 hours. Or just barely over 2 days. I hate focusing on it but I am. It has been beyond wonderful having him here with me. We’ve barely been apart the whole time he’s been here, I don’t know what I’m going to do when I go back to my completely alone routine.

Directly outside my front door are these flower bushes on each side of my walkway. Bright yellow flowers have sprouted up but what makes it so pretty to us is the fact that each and every flower has stretched themselves toward the sun. They’ve curled and bent every which way to make sure they can catch the sun’s rays for the day.
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We’ve been loving walking out and seeing them stretching out for the day.

:: ~ :: ~ :: ~ ::

All my Christmas decorations have been taken down and stored away. My home looks empty and cold now. Thankfully I have G-man here to ease the emptiness, but who knows how I’ll handle the emptiness after he leaves.

This is no way started out as a Debbie Downer post but sure spiraled quickly in that direction.

I’m so thankful he’s here and the time I’ve had with him. I’ve truly enjoyed every single moment with him watching movies every single night. Him baking an apple pie, serving it with ice cream and coffee. Us baking brownies with an ice cold glass of milk. Him being intent on me watching the Rocky movies to see just how much it’s a love story more than a boxing movie, and me seeing it and holding back the tears in certain scenes.

It’s the little things I’m focusing on right now. I have to focus on the little things.

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Thursday, January 5, 2012

Facebook be gone!

Aaahhhh!! I did it! I can’t believe I finally did it. After making the announcement on my wall, I gave it a few days for everyone to see and then found myself waiting an extra day…then another day, as I scanned each status and new picture as they were posted from the holidays. But last night I took the bull by the horns and deleted my personal Facebook account.

Oh glory be, halleluiah, amen! I’m so happy I did it.
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I’ve thought a lot about this lately. For the past year, I’d say. If you remember, even back in July, I wrote just how much Facebook was boring me, so after some thought and some wishy washiness on my part, I finally girded my loins {in the non vulgar way of course} and canceled my account.

:::Phew!:::

I have many reasons…in case you’re asking yourself, why would she do that?!

Well, let me tell ya.

After writing about being bored with it in July, LeAnna send me her reason for cancelling her account. She had many valid points that I actually agreed with. So it left me thinking more about it.
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Enter December and Becky giving her reason why she deleted her account all while linking to Neolani’s reason. At that point I was all pumped up. Doing the Rocky dance, gearing myself up for what would be the demise of my Facebook account.

I still hemmed and hawed a bit. Even though I never would comment on anyone’s status or pictures anymore, I still got on there at least an embarrassingly 20 to 30 times a day to scan everything real quick to see what was new and quickly jump off.

It became my wooby. My security blanket routine. Check email, check Facebook, check other email, check Twitter…rinse and repeat.

When I was getting asked from my Facebook friends why I was doing it, since it was a bit of a shock to a lot of them, I put it simply.
my exact answer to them:
Well, you can say I'm tired of being a creeper. Of jumping on FB several times a day to read updates and look at new pictures, never commenting but feeling its 'good enough' to know what that person's up to. I'm tired of people close to me feeling its ok to make a huge announcement via a status update and thinking its adequate, and not a personal call. And feeling frustrated over all the negative statuses and arguments. Of losing the friendship connections, never calling or emailing to have a true conversation, and vice versa. I've been considering this for months and today was the last straw for me seeing someone be rude to someone else. I want true friendships back. To have the effort be made to remain connected and involved in each other's lives.

Everyone seemed to appreciate my reason and asked for my information to keep in touch. Will we, on the few that did? I don’t know but we’ll soon find out. But I’m ok on the ones who were only ‘comparing themselves with me’ to separate myself from them. Or the ones who I hardly knew that were 4 years older than me in high school to not stay up in my business and me not being up in theirs, not to mention all my old co workers.

I’ll miss hearing the little things that my close friends and family will write and share but this will {I hope} encourage us to stay more in touch than before. And I do have this blog. This here blog shows more of me than any Facebook page could ever. With my family being far away and a chance that one day they’ll be even further, my blog will continue to provide them up to date information about all the happenings in my parts.

So there, my friends, is the reason I deleted my Facebook account last night.

Have you been thinking of deleting yours? What’s your reason for hanging on? Pin It Now!

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