Tuesday, February 1, 2011

And it begins...

6-9 months. That's what the retirement office told me a week ago when I turned in my paperwork for a disability retirement. That's how long it will take for them to process the claim. That's how long I am NOT allowed to work. That's how long I will be going without any sort of pay. Did I panic? Oooh yeah! They have made it very clear that under no circumstances am I allowed to work any type of job while my retirement paperwork is being processed, however the lovely state of CA along with the even lovelier Department of Corrections offers no 'assistance' to someone who is unable to work due to a disability. And doesn't seem to be too concerned with how they expect me to financially support myself during all this.

What's my disability? Thought you'd never ask. Neuromas. Neuro-what?! Foot Health describes it best. Neuroma Explained But here's the kicker...I've had them removed and even more so I should be perfectly fine by now. See, I saw the Dr in 2007 for the pain in BOTH feet. He did the x-rays and determined that yes, though very very rare, I have a neuroma in BOTH feet. And what's even more rare is I had 2 surgeries for 2 previous neuromas 3 years before that. But since I was completely engrossed in my job with the current prison I was working, I didn't want to take all that time off work for the recovery. I put it off for 3 more years, and when April 2010 rolled around, I couldn't take the pain anymore and since I was now a Sgt. and at a new prison I felt it was the right time to have the surgery. Dr. P. (keeping all names under wraps) said it was a great success, both neuromas were removed and the 3rd neuroma I was feeling (yes, I said 3rd!) in the old spot (where the 2 previous surgeries were done), was injected with the alcohol solution to "deaden the nerve even further." As I recover over the months, God blessed me with all the hours (time on the books) I accrued to continue providing my full paychecks, as well as the program CDC offered by me stating it was a Non Industrial Injury. All is going well financially however I'm not recovering like I'm supposed to. I'm having a hard time walking, sitting, even standing. The only comfort I get is when my feet are elevated and even then they can give off some real good pain. I keep seeing Dr. P. and he keeps wanting to inject me. But they aren't working! 6 months later, I see another podiatrist, Dr. F. and he scratches his head unsure what's wrong. I see a neurologist Dr. N. and he says my career is over. My nerves are damaged and the only job I'll ever be able to do is work a desk. I'm floored! Never going to work on the line again?! I talk to Dr. P. and he confirms I'll never be able to work again.

So the only option I have...disability retirement. And that's what this will all be about. The pains, struggles and frustrations I'm facing with the State, with CDC, without income and learning to have full and complete faith and reliance on God to provide in the coming months of uncertainty.
What my sad feet looked like shortly after the stitches were removed.  Pin It Now!

1 comment:

Sam {fitnessfoodandfaith.blogspot.com} said...

i hadn't read this story before. you poor thing. those scars look serious!

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